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Here is a little Quinton Rampage Jackson doing his best Joe Namath impression. WTF is he thinking?


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E-mails from an asshole...

Very funny prank email website, based upon responding to internet classified ads or posting fake ads and messing with the responders. Some real comedic gems here.

Linky.

Just a taste:

Original Ad:

Wanted: ride from philly to rehoboth beachi am trying to leave any time next friday. will pay for gas, and provide conversation.i am bringing a large duffel bag and a cat.

From Mike Partlow to chris **********

Hey,I have to go to court in Rehoboth next Friday, so I would be able to give you a ride. I just want to know, you're female, right?

Mike

From chris ******** to Me

i am male. what time did you want to leave?

-chris

From Mike Partlow to chris *********

Chris,I'm sorry, I thought you were female because you said you owned a cat. Sorry, but I don't want to give you a ride. Two dudes in a car, going to Rehoboth, it just seems a little gay. Better luck next time.

Mike

From chris ******** to Me

wtf how is that gay? i just want a ride!

From Mike Partlow to chris *********

Well normally I wouldn't think anything of it, but first off, you own a cat, and you are a dude. That is a huge red flag right there. Any normal straight guy wouldn't own a cat, and if he did, he wouldn't care about the cat enough to take it to the beach. Second, you want to go to Rehomo Beach. I'm not judging your lifestyle or anything man, I just don't want you gaying up my car. No offense. I don't even want to know what is in your duffel bag.

From chris ******** to Me

stfu dude why are you being a prick! im not fucking gay i just cant get a fucking ride to the beach! my GIRLFRIEND happens to have a house in rehoboth!!

From Mike Partlow to chris *********

Yeah, I'm sure he does.

I think Richard Simmons is driving down there next week, try to get a ride with him.

I hate mahself

I hate "The Deadliest Catch" (I am pissed even more at my self that I took the time to capitalize the title) but for some bizzaro reason I have been hooked (gayest pun ever...I know) to this show since the marathon on sunday. I blame my ultra ass hole brother in law ADAM ZIRBS. If you want his address and phone number for unfiltered harassment just email me you can have it.
ps Adam if your reading and I know you are, my eyes and ears whispered to me during the "After the Catch" diarreasode..."YOU FUCKING FAGGOT!" It wasnt so much of a whisper as my ears and eyes are still bleeding.

oh and that brewer game gave me an ulcer I think.

Live Music Friday: Otis Redding

(Yeah, I know it's not Friday, but I'm taking tomorrow off from everything.)

Otis Redding is the greatest soul singer who ever lived. Fuck those other people you're thinking of, they ain't shit. Otis had an incredible voice coupled with a powerful spirit, which together conveyed a broad range of emotion, from casual depression to deep sorrow, from tenderness to intense sexuality. He also knew how to treat a song, which is what is so lacking in the wanna-be soul singers of today. He treated it like a sweet, sweet lady. He started off slow and tender, gently worked up a little sweat, gradually built up to an emotional climax and finally let it all come pouring out in the finale.

When you hear a douchebag like Michael Bolton singing "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay," he's giving it 110% from the first line. Then, the whole song sounds the same...boring and overdone. Listen to Otis sing "Dock," it starts off very casual but sad, almost mumbling the lines. The sadness slowly grows and the longer he dwells on it the more intense it becomes, until he finally builds up to a howl with, "looks like nothing's gonna change, everything still remains the same..." The listener can feel it build, and Otis takes you with him on the emotional ride. That's fucking artistry, my friends. But, as demonstrated below, the Man could also deliver tremendous joy and celebration in a song with an energy that would make anybody want to get up and move. I am a cynical bastard, and even I crack a smile when Otis gets going with "I Can't Turn You Loose" as recorded on the British television showcase, Ready, Steady, Go!

Otis was also a legendary live performer. Piss on us for being born in the '70s and '80s, because Otis was a regular visitor to Madison in the '60s. He performed there frequently, and actually died when his pot-smoking pilot crashed the small plane into Lake Monona on the way to a performance at the Factory in Madison, on Sunday night, December 10, 1967. Madison party people were in line outside the club waiting for the doors to open when Otis's death was announced to the shocked fans. (The Factory was located on Gorham near State, in the building that currently houses Avol's Bookstore.) Sadly, those people didn't get to see Otis that night, nor on any other night ever again. They missed out on something great, as did our entire generation.

Incidentally, the opening act that night, a band from Rockford called the The Grim Reapers, decided that their morbid name was no longer appropriate after Otis's death. They later became Cheap Trick. Here's a taste of what those saddened ticket-holders might have seen if the plane had made it to the airport. The greatest soul singer of all time, who died a legend at the age of 26. I don't know what I was doing when I was 26, but nobody will be talking about it 40 years from now.

YOGA NO WIN 4 U

That was horse shit, Yovani pitched a bute today. 7 innings pitched 5 hits, season high (maybe even career high) 12 strike outs and 1 fucking run take the loss today. I prety bummed about this, but I am sure pitchers dont really take the loses personal epecially when you pitch like that. It is good to see YO pitch well today, it has to be a big confidence booster. Actually that was a really good series for the Crew pitching wise. Pooper had a decent game monday, Mike "3rd degree" Burns pitched exceptionally well lastnight, and than Yo today. Lets hope they can keep it going in the right direction. I know personally, last week was the first time I felt any worry about the Brewers. When they sent Manny down and Bush to the DL and Soup well...Soup being Soup. There pitching was finally showing some fatigue. So it is good to see this series, and yes I know the Mets suck right now.
4 gamer at The worlds biggest gay bar starting tomorrow. It should be a good series!

Humpday: Public Enemies

I believe Public Enemies is opening today, and yeah I am freaking excited. Not only for the beautifl Marion Cotillard (brunette) and Emilie de Ravin (blond) that will be hopefully getting nakey in the movie, but this film is directed by Mike Mann and stars Johnny Depp, Christian Bale, Billy Crudup, and Giovanni Ribisi, all favorites of mine. Though you could not tell from any of the previews because all you see is Johnny Depp in every single trailer. Anyways, I think this could be really good. Enjoy!