I have to tell you something. Ladies, I am going to have to ask you to sit down. This isn't going to be easy, but I don't know how else to say this...ummm whewww this is tough a...lot..harder....than I thought it was going to be. How do I say this...its not you........its me. All the rumors are true, I proposed to my girlfriend. We have been together for about three and half years and well...gulp quite frankly you are all skanks and you annoy me. LOL just kidding you don't annoy me, I am just not allowed to talk to you anymore. Thats right bitches C-Weed is off the market, so sit on your hands and close your legs. Its starting to smell like tuna in here. Am I right guys, hahah...ha..ha huuuuuhhh. Who am I kidding I am no Freddy Prince Jr. But I do feel like a million bucks. I am set to marry the most important person in my life, If she actually lets me. I have to say this was probably one of the easiest decisions I have ever made. Callie is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I am sure if you really know me you will agree. The hard part was trying to full fill what I thought was her perfect engagement. I had an idea of how I wanted to get engaged, but that it involved lots of sex and buffalo wings. Turns out not everyone is into that. Huh, I know right. I have had the ring for some time, but I was waiting for the right time and the right place. I think I was so worried about making it perfect that I couldnt even think of anything unique. Well I was getting pretty impatient and couldnt wait any longer. I decided Saturday morning while bow hunting that there is no reason to wait any longer. Today is the day, just do it already you pussy. Since Callie has been going to school and working nights we haven't had much personal time. Well she had the night off and was planning a supa good homemade Chinese dinner. So After dinner we settled in to some late night TV. I had to mix up all a tall boy to settle the nerves. I went to my incredibly secret hiding place and pulled out the ring and thats when it hit me. "Holly fuck I am really about to do this! Right now holly fuck!" So I pulled myself together walked up stairs into the living room and froze. I was freaking out, so I stood there watching some Americas Funniest Videos, laughing like a total awkward fag. It was pretty obvious I was up to something, luckily she normally blocks me out completely so she didn't notice anything out of the ordinary. So I grabbed my (nuts) nerves and asked her to put the computer down for a minute. I got on one knee began to shake like a little bitch and the rest is history.
We don't have a date at the moment. We decided to wait until she finishes school in May to hash out the details. I would imagine probably a year and a half to two years before we make er' official.
Soooo yeah lets hear all the lame wedding cliches in the comments, like
-well its your funeral
-your gay
-the old ball and chain
-little black book
-do you want to go to the strip club
...wait yes, yes I do.
