Monday, April 27, 2009

Coming Clean: The Pepperoni Story

This was an epic weekend highlighted by a four hour dance festival, a no limit party, our first annual NFL draft party, getting punched in the face twice, seeing Mark Tauscher at the Bris, seeing a bunch of old friends, hanging out with the happiest 8 month old I know, as well as spending sunday with my family. Like I said it was a crazy weekend. However I would like to talk about something that happened on Friday that had been culminating since my sophomore year of high school. That is the story of the Pepperoni Nipples.

When I got home from work friday a few friends were over enjoying the near 80 degree weather wisconsin style with beer and bags. One of the friends that was there I had not partied with in long time and it was great to see her. We havent stayed very close and I am mainly to blame (you will soon know why). Well we got to talking and drinking and talking and drinking before I slipped up and called her peps. This was not on purpose just an old habbit. She got very angry and demanded that I tell her the story around the nickname that had followed her around for many, many years. So I explained it to her and I apologized for coming up with this horrible nickname that I had no idea would stick. Anyways, now that I have come clean with her and apologized I figured I could post the story.

So my inadequcies as a lover early on in my high school career are well documented. My flat hand story will follow me to the grave whether I like it or not. Early in my sophomore year I started to hang out with a different crowd, an older crowd and just like many kids in my shoes I tried my hardest to impress my new friends. Since I didnt have my license yet, I usually had to beg them to come get me at my parents house and take me out where ever they were going. Well I talked them into going to a party at this girls house in my grade. Anyways towards the end of the night I slipped away with a girl from my class and things got a little heated. Since I had an early curfew at that point I was only able to round first base, before i got a call from boys saying it was time to leave. So we left and they started greasing me for tales of my conquest. I didnt really know what to say, I didnt have many hook up stories at that point so I wasnt very good at giving details. Since not much happened i wanted to spice up the parts that did. I told them that she had great breasts and her nipples were huge, I compared them to pepperoni's. Well when we got to school on Monday nothing was different, but later that night at football practice word got out on my little hookup and the nickname, Peps, came to be. It started as kind of fun joke where only the guys on the team new about it, but it wouldnt be long before every single guy in the school started reffering to her as Peps. She told me on Friday that people she didnt even know would call her that, and I know her brother has called her that as well. For all these years she had no idea where the nickname came from. I did feel bad, I should have explained to her why the nickname started, and I probably didnt give my best effort in putting the story to bed. For that I am sorry, but it sure feels good to come clean, and put this story to bed once and for all.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Seriously, you saw Tauscher at a ritualist circumcision ceremony for a Jewish boy?

Big Tasty said...

Unfortunately not, in this case the bris stands for the Bristol St. Gentlemans Club.

McGarnagle said...

Who punched you twice B?

Anonymous said...

I forgot that Tausch was out there, I was a little drunk.

CC