The anecdote is back

People have been telling me that the only reason they come to this blog is to read funny stories of my childhood so if I want to continue to get people to read I guess I have to give the readers what they want. So every Friday I will again be telling stories that make me the person I am today. They will also have a theme to them. As all of you probably know I went to college in Milwaukee and I loved it there, but throughout my time there I frequently liked to visit other schools around wisky. So the first theme of the Friday Anecdote will be State School Adventures. The first story is about one of my best friends Jake Schaub's 21st birthday party. My buddy Aaron and I decided we would head up too Stevens Point to show Jake a good time. The thing about Jake's friends is the weren't used to partying with the likes of Aaron, and I so we new it would be a great time. I am not saying they did not like to party, but they had not witnessed the pure destruction and chaos that was often brought by the two of us. The night started with a party Jakes house. We decided that we should probably pick up some booze because Aaron at the time could not drink a beer. He decided to go with Fleischmans and I Old Thompsons. It was not long before our bottles were nearly gone and the happy birthday song was being sang to Jake. One of his chick friends made him a cake, how sweet, as soon as the song was over I proceeded to stick a couple of brats in the freshly frosted cake not making me a huge fan of the evening. This was heightened by the huge handful of cake I tossed at the birthday boy barely missing him, but getting caked all over there futon (Pun intended). I think Jakes roomies had scene enough of the house trashing so we decided to go to the bar. We caught a ride with two chicks and somehow aaron found himself in the trunk putting on what looked like a prom dress. After receiving plenty of dirty looks at the first bar I urged Aaron to take off the fucking dress so we didn't get beat up. He agreed that was probably a good idea and we decided to head to another bar, Bruisers. This was a favorite of the point crowd and I think Jake was wanting to get fucked up there for the first time. I was happy to oblige him and sat at the bar and proceeded to pound shot after shot. When the three wise men was ordered Jake did not think he was going to be able to take it down. He uttered to me, "i cant im going to fucking puke", to which I replied, "you will take these shots and then puke all over this fucking bar!" Jake agreed to take the shots to which he immediately ran outside to puke. I talked him into coming into the bar for a couple more shots, but they delivered the same results. This time he had enough and he left leaving aaron and I across down having to find our own way home. It did not take long for us attempt the long walk talking shit to everyone that passed us. If you know anything about Aaron and his 175 lb bald frame is that he is not a fighter making that walk home even more interesting. Many people got in our face only to realize that we were incredible drunk and to let us be. One of Jakes roommates saw us walking and picked us up and gave us a ride back to Jakes. This is when the night truly became interesting. The first order of business was getting the canoe we saw outside on top of the roof. As we attempted this feet I tripped and fell down the side of this slope and got covered in mud. To top it off Aaron, pissed at my lack of effort, threw the canoe down on top of me. I was pissed it was raining, I was muddy, and Aaron was giggling like a bitch. When I got inside I saw aaron standing in front of the fridge pillaging like some barbarian. I opened up the freezer and grabbed the first thing I saw, a frozen trout that Jake had caught, and smacked it right across aarons back. Aaron an a somewhat unorthodox move grabbed the milk from the fridge and poured it all over his own head. Yeah I dont understand either just accept the fact that aaron is an idiot. I wanted to show the birthday boy what kind of mess Aaron had made but he locked himself in his room. His girl was in town so he must of been getting his present. This displeased me greatly and I took another one of his presents, a shot glass that his brother got him, and threw against his door shattering it. I guess I wasn't really thinking that people usually don't wear shoes to bed and that could have been the worst idea I ever had. I lose memory at that point, but I woke up on the futon with my face in a pile a cake to a bunch of angry looks. Aaron encouraged me to get the fuck out of there so we didn't have to face the music. I was happy to oblige him and needless to say we didn't get an invite to Jakes 22nd birthday.